A lapsed lawyer breaks it down

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Photo by Hasan Almasi on Unsplash

In January, Trump was charged with an impeachment charge of “incitement of insurrection” against the U.S. government. He’d urged supporters to come to D.C. for a “Save America March” on the day Congress would ceremonially count Joe Biden’s win, telling them to “be there, will be wild!

During a 5-day impeachment trial, prosecutors argued the Capitol siege was foreseeable after Trump spent years endorsing violence among his supporters. Trump’s lawyers argued that the impeachment proceedings were unconstitutional because Trump was no longer in office.

In February, Trump was acquitted. Following the acquittal, minority leader Mitch McConnell said the Senate was…


A lapsed lawyer breaks down civil procedure

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Photo by Wesley Tingey on Unsplash

My book Bad Lawyer drops this May. It’s about my wack experiences in law school, courthouses, and law offices. The idea is to demystify law as a revered profession. And in anticipation of its release, I’ve decided to do a series of accessible and hopefully entertaining primers on legal topics. I think a lot of people are curious about what exactly is taught in law school but are intimidated by the unnecessarily esoteric and elitist way the material is presented.

So alas, here is my attempt to elucidate, to show you it isn’t that scary and can at times even…


A lapsed lawyer breaks it down

Image for post
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Photo by Tingey Injury Law Firm on Unsplash

My book Bad Lawyer drops this May. It’s about my wack experiences in law school, courthouses, and law offices. The idea is to demystify law as a revered profession. And in anticipation of its release, I’ve decided to do a series of accessible and hopefully entertaining primers on legal topics. I think a lot of people are curious about what exactly is taught in law school but are intimidated by the unnecessarily esoteric and elitist way the material is presented.

So alas, here is my attempt to elucidate, to show you it isn’t that scary and can be kind of…


U Up? drops today

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Author Catie Disabato is my ex-girlfriend. Unlike her U Up? protagonist Eve and her ex Bea, Catie and I are on good terms. We continue to exchange writing and are even in the same writing group. We were dating for most of Catie’s drafting of U Up?, and in the acknowledgments Catie credits me with helping her finish it (although I don’t remember that at all). But I’m excited to see it in the world. The novel is about a baddy witch on an emotional and chemical bender all over Los Angeles. It’s a blast. …


A lapsed lawyer breaks it down

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Photo by Luke Michael on Unsplash

My book Bad Lawyer drops this May. It’s about my wack experiences in law school, courthouses, and law offices. The idea is to demystify law as a revered profession. And in anticipation of its release, I’ve decided to write a series of accessible and hopefully entertaining primers on legal topics. I think a lot of people are curious about what exactly is taught in law school but are intimidated by the unnecessarily esoteric and elitist way the material is presented.

So alas, here is my attempt to elucidate, to show you it isn’t that scary and can be kind of…


A lapsed lawyer breaks it down

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Tingey Injury Law Firm on Unsplash

My book Bad Lawyer drops this May. It’s about my wack experiences in law school, courthouses, and law offices. The idea is to demystify law as a revered profession. And in anticipation of its release, I’ve decided to do a series of accessible and hopefully entertaining primers on legal topics. I think a lot of people are curious about what exactly is taught in law school but are intimidated by the unnecessarily esoteric and elitist way the material is presented.

So alas, here is my attempt to elucidate, to show you it isn’t that scary and can actually be kind…


The great psychotropic mindfuck

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I’ve always fantasized about walking into my therapist’s office, lowering my sunglasses, and announcing: “well, I’m cured!”

Sometimes I feel that way, when I’m on an upswing. I’ll talk to my therapist like I’m the most neurotypical person on the planet. “Anxiety? I don’t know her!”

But as preeminent anxiety writer Melissa Broder said: “Just when I think I’m never going to have panic attacks again, that’s when I start to get them again.”

Same.

Things will be great, and I’ll feel like I’m approaching happiness or some degree or normalcy. I’ll think to myself, “I just hope my anxiety…


Planet Soul

It’s just woo-woo-speak for toxic codependency

Two people standing close together in the dark with colorful, abstract shapes projected onto them.
Two people standing close together in the dark with colorful, abstract shapes projected onto them.
Photo: Plume Creative/DigitalVision/Getty Images

Last year, I was eating a salad and watching Bravo’s Southern Charm when cast member Madison LeCroy called her on-again, off-again boyfriend Austen her “twin flame.”

A piece of lettuce fell out of my mouth.

I’d been reading a lot about twin flames at the time, mostly because my messy lover had said I was hers. (To be fair, I was messy too. We were messy together.)

And I’d been seeing my own twisted relationship in Austen and Madison’s desperate attempts to cling to each other despite all logical evidence that they should not be together. They had different values…


2020 in review

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Normally these types of lists come out before the new year, but who cares about time anymore?

2020 was a weird one. A virus named for a Mexican lager ravaged planet Earth. The US government fucked up even more than usual. The chaos queen was voted out of the White House by a zombie and a cop. We all became captivated by a TV show starring Hugh Grant.

Whenever the world gets bleak, I comfort myself by remembering that a compelling book or album or movie is around the corner. …


This Is Us

Coming to terms with my sexual anorexia

Double exposure photo of woman with light trails.
Double exposure photo of woman with light trails.
Photo: Mireia Moreno Mateos/EyeEm/Getty Images

In her 2000 novel Aliens and Anorexia, Chris Kraus writes that it’s “impossible to conceive a female life that might extend outside itself.” That is, we expect women to be insular, private, shrinking. Kraus is writing about philosopher Simone Weil, who starved herself to death at 34, the age I am now.

I was first diagnosed with anorexia at age 11.

Weil refused to eat more than the rations allotted to French soldiers and citizens remaining on her native land. …

anna dorn

vagablonde (unnamed press, may 2020); bad lawyer (hachette books, spring 2021)

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